RESCU
  • Style
    • All
    • Beauty
    • Fashion
    • Home & Auto
    • Luxury & Travel
    • Resources
    • Sustainability

    The Anatomy Of Ageing

    Why You Need A Wardrobe Detox

    Finding Your Style Icon

    Why the Internet is Obsessed with Liquid Nose Jobs

    Gift Giving: How to Choose a Perfume

    • Beauty
    • Fashion
    • Home & Auto
    • Luxury & Travel
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
  • Substance
    • All
    • Food & Drink
    • Relationships
    • Resources
    • Reviews
    • Science & Innovation
    • Sustainability
    • Wellbeing

    The Psychology of Enjoying Food Without The Guilt Plus A Recipe

    Could Mindful Breathing Change Your Life?

    Money Makes the World Go Round

    Recipes For Everyday Wellness

    Why the Internet is Obsessed with Liquid Nose Jobs

    • Wellbeing
    • Science & Innovation
    • Relationships
    • Food & Drink
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
    • Reviews
  • Success
    • All
    • Career & Tech
    • Inspirational Profiles
    • Money
    • Property
    • Resources
    • Sustainability

    An Accountant’s Essential Checklist for Setting Up a Side Hustle

    Money Makes the World Go Round

    How To Turn Your Passion Into A Business

    Your Moonology forecast for 2021

    Australia’s Great Regional Relocation

    • Money
    • Property
    • Inspirational Profiles
    • Career & Tech
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
  • Subscribe
  • About us
  • Rescu Me Academy
    • Courses
    • RESCU Me! Book
No Result
View All Result
  • Style
    • All
    • Beauty
    • Fashion
    • Home & Auto
    • Luxury & Travel
    • Resources
    • Sustainability

    The Anatomy Of Ageing

    Why You Need A Wardrobe Detox

    Finding Your Style Icon

    Why the Internet is Obsessed with Liquid Nose Jobs

    Gift Giving: How to Choose a Perfume

    • Beauty
    • Fashion
    • Home & Auto
    • Luxury & Travel
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
  • Substance
    • All
    • Food & Drink
    • Relationships
    • Resources
    • Reviews
    • Science & Innovation
    • Sustainability
    • Wellbeing

    The Psychology of Enjoying Food Without The Guilt Plus A Recipe

    Could Mindful Breathing Change Your Life?

    Money Makes the World Go Round

    Recipes For Everyday Wellness

    Why the Internet is Obsessed with Liquid Nose Jobs

    • Wellbeing
    • Science & Innovation
    • Relationships
    • Food & Drink
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
    • Reviews
  • Success
    • All
    • Career & Tech
    • Inspirational Profiles
    • Money
    • Property
    • Resources
    • Sustainability

    An Accountant’s Essential Checklist for Setting Up a Side Hustle

    Money Makes the World Go Round

    How To Turn Your Passion Into A Business

    Your Moonology forecast for 2021

    Australia’s Great Regional Relocation

    • Money
    • Property
    • Inspirational Profiles
    • Career & Tech
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
  • Subscribe
  • About us
  • Rescu Me Academy
    • Courses
    • RESCU Me! Book
No Result
View All Result
RESCU
No Result
View All Result
Home Substance Relationships

Resources For Extricating Yourself From Narcissistic Abuse

Reading Time: 3 minutes
Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on Pinterest

Previously we talked to Marianne Vicelich, Psychologist and author of Destruction: Free Yourself From The Narcissist about identifying narcissistic behaviours in relationships.

We have asked Marianne to share an extract from her book here.Download

Test yourself: Are You a Narcissist?

On a scale from 1 to 5, indicate how much you agree or disagree with each item, using the guide below:

1 – Strongly disagree

2 – Disagree

3 – Neutral

4 – Agree

5 – Strongly agree

  1. Compliments make me uncomfortable.
  2. It irritates me when someone gets ahead by being the star.
  3. I have missed out on opportunities because I was uncomfortable nominating myself.
  4. Sometimes I won’t state my ideas because someone else’s will be better.
  5. I often refer to other people’s opinions.
  6. I worry about how other people feel and think about me.
  7. I am not sure what I want or need in relationships.
  8. When people ask me my preferences, I am often at a loss.
  9. I blame myself when things go badly in a relationship.
  10. I apologise a lot.
  11. I am self-confident, but caring.
  12. I press on, even when tasks are challenging.
  13. I take more pride in my achievements when I have to work hard at them.
  14. I can recognise my limitations without feeling bad about myself.
  15. I am happy to acknowledge my faults if it improves a situation.
  16. I believe all partners contribute to the success or failure of a relationship.
  17. I can rein myself in when people tell me I am getting a big head.
  18. I like to dream big but not at the expense of my relationships.
  19. I’ll take giving over receiving any day.
  20. Despite setbacks, I believe in myself.
  21. I find it easy to manipulate people.
  22. I insist on getting the respect that’s due.
  23. I expect a great deal from other people.
  24. I will never be satisfied until I get all I deserve.
  25. I secretly believe I am better than other people.
  26. I get extremely angry when criticised.
  27. I get upset when people don’t notice how I look in public.
  28. I am apt to show off if I get a chance.
  29. I have a strong willpower.
  30. I am great at a lot of things compared to most people.

Narcissism deficits – add items 1-10 and enter your score here _________

Healthy Narcissism – add items 11-20 and enter your score here ________

Extreme Narcissism – add items 21-30 and enter your score here ________

Understanding your score

The first total represents your placement on the left of the spectrum (narcissism deficits), the second reflects your tendency towards the centre (healthy narcissism), and the third gives you a rough sense of how far you are leaning towards extreme narcissism.

Interpreting Your Score

Narcissism Deficits

The average score for Narcissism Deficits is 28. If you scored between 28 and 34 or lower you are fine.

People who scored high (35 or above) tend to:

  • Suffer from low self-esteem
  • Subjugate themselves to their partner’s wishes and needs
  • Feel undeserving/under-entitled
  • Struggle to receive and give emotional support
  • Feel pessimistic
  • Are modest
  • Feel anxious, depressed and emotionally fragile

Healthy Narcissism

The average for healthy narcissism is 39. A lower score here confirms that you don’t necessarily enjoy feeling special (though you might tolerate it).

People who scored higher on this factor tend to:

  • Be calm, optimistic and cheery
  • Possess high self-esteem
  • Excel at giving and receiving emotional support
  • Experience a sense of purpose in life
  • Are self-disciplined
  • Are trusting, enjoy closeness, and emotional intimacy
  • Feel deserving, but not over-entitled

People with healthy narcissism are more likely to view not just themselves as special, they also see their partners as better than others too.

Extreme Narcissism

The average score is 27, yet if you received higher then this is problematic. If you scored higher than 42 you are entering the territory of pathological narcissism.

High scorers tend to:

  • Have fluctuating self-esteem
  • Struggle to give and receive emotional support
  • Are entitled, manipulative, and approval seeking
  • See themselves as better than their partners (and everyone else)
  • Seem argumentative, unco-operative, and selfish
  • Seem unemotional (apart from anger and thrill seeking)
  • Experience significant conflicts at work
  • Their ego is brittle and easily shattered, they protect themselves by boasting about their gifts or blaming others when their self-image is threatened. And their relationships clearly suffer from their argumentative, careless approach with other people.

In rare circumstances, people score high on narcissism deficits and high on extreme narcissism. If your score reflects that pattern, it likely means that you vacillate between extremes of feeling worthless and feeling superior.

Other resources

If anyone has been impacted by emotional or physical abuse to contact a free support counselling service here:

https://www.1800respect.org.au/

Marianne Vicelich is a psychologist, relationship coach and author of 8 published self-help books including ‘Destruction: Free Yourself From The Narcissist‘.

Related Posts

Food & Drink

The Psychology of Enjoying Food Without The Guilt Plus A Recipe

Wellbeing

Could Mindful Breathing Change Your Life?

Money

Money Makes the World Go Round

Substance

Recipes For Everyday Wellness

Beauty

Why the Internet is Obsessed with Liquid Nose Jobs

Success

Your Moonology forecast for 2021

Substance

Dealing with Menopause Naturally

Relationships

How To Delete Destructive Behaviours & Narcissistic Relationships

Money

Shining the Light on Your Personal Finances

Load More

Rescu. TV

Currently Playing

Rescu. Me Academy

Instagram

This error message is only visible to WordPress admins

Error: No connected account.

Please go to the Instagram Feed settings page to connect an account.

Get fashion, beauty, finance, health and love advice from our experts.

Rescu.com.au is an online destination across multiple platforms for the modern woman who is ready to be her own success story. Expert advice, articles and resources to glow up or completely transform your Style, Substance and Success.
Through our deep dive content, clever how to’s, product review, resources including calculators and downloadable assets, and of course our expert panellists, we inform and support our reader to dial up the fabulous in every aspect of her life.

STYLE

SUBSTANCE

SUCCESS

SOCIETY

RESCU. ME ACADEMY

Follow us

  • About Us
  • Advertise With Us
  • Privacy & Terms

© 2020 Rescu. All Rights Reserved

RESCU
  • Style
    • Beauty
    • Fashion
    • Home & Auto
    • Luxury & Travel
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
  • Substance
    • Wellbeing
    • Science & Innovation
    • Relationships
    • Food & Drink
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
    • Reviews
  • Success
    • Money
    • Property
    • Inspirational Profiles
    • Career & Tech
    • Sustainability
    • Resources
  • Subscribe
  • About us
  • Rescu Me Academy
    • Courses
    • RESCU Me! Book

Welcome Back!

Login to your account below

Forgotten Password?

Create New Account!

Fill the forms bellow to register

All fields are required. Log In

Retrieve your password

Please enter your username or email address to reset your password.

Log In

Add New Playlist